Banter for Friday

Today started like any other. Up at six, made the wife breakfast and lunch, and sent her on her way. Cooked and ate breakfast, then got on the computer.

I started nodding off and seriously considered lying down and grabbing some Zz. Then my phone rang. It was the contractor asking if he could start work today on the carpenter job.(Funny how it had slipped my mind completely).

One guy was already here (I keep the doorbell disconnected unless I am expecting someone. I am shocked at all the excuses people have to disturb my quiet suburban lifestyle; can I mow your yard? can I trim your trees? can I paint house numbers on  your curb? can I wash your cars?) in the front with his ladder scoping out the rotten wood.

I spoke with him briefly, very briefly as he spoke little English. I pointed to the side gate and I went into the house to get the gate key as one can only unlock it from inside the back yard.

As I opened the sliding door to the back, I was accosted by two spooked dogs (we don’t have any). Fucking neighbors I thought.

I made my way to the gate and let in the carpenter. Then I surveyed how the dogs got in, and found where they had dug under the fence. A giant spaniel, and an oversized chihuahua.

So, I trudged over to the neighbor’s and asked “how many dogs do you have?”

“Three, why?”

“Because two of them are in my back yard.”

“What do they look like?”

“A black and white and a very nervous chihuahua.”

He nodded “I’m on my way.”

The chihuahua had already dug his way back, and the neighbor carried the spaniel out. I pointed out the fence had a slat that was almost falling off. He fixed that while I was bricking up the hole under the fence.

When we bought the house, my neighbor at the time (the current family that lives there are renting from the owner) did not have a fence. His son bought a pure bred basset hound ($1200 that he never paid for) so the neighbor just tacked onto my fence, and the neighbor on the other side.

Where I come from, you offer to pay owner of existing fence a few bucks…he didn’t. I used to be able to go around into his yard and do fence repairs myself. Not any more. Every day I wished I lived in the country.

The contractor showed up, and he and the carpenter looked around at the impending job. I set the chainsaw out for them so they could do a little more cutting on the pecan tree that I was unable to reach.

I decided to rack my beer while they were here. I was just finishing with that when the contractor pointed out that it had started to rain, and they would be back Monday.

That was 10:00 am.

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