Zero Hour

First of all, I want you to play the song while you read on..go ahead; jam with me and

As I awoke from my extended afternoon nap yesterday, I staggered out into the kitchen where the wife was sitting, with a rather wry smile on her face.

“How are you feeling?” a question that I have been asked countless times in the past several weeks.

“Worse” I managed to hoarsely answer as I fumbled in the pantry looking for something.

She cleared her throat and began “SIL and BIL are not coming after all.”

I literally stopped in my tracks “are you fucking kidding me?”

She shook her head “no, I’m not. It’s complicated, so sit down, shut up, and listen.”

I rarely obey such a harsh command, but this was such potentially good news, that I did as she asked.

Now one must understand before I continue, that this tale is from the lips of SIL, repeated through my wife. SIL does not have enough common sense to shove up a gnat’s ass. I will translate for you, and paraphrase so to fill in the gaps in this bobble headed explanation.

The street light outside of SIL’s house fell over onto the fence between them and their asshole neighbor. It collapsed the fence. They called the city, and the city sent out an “inspector” to assess the situation.

Apparently, the inspector showed up at asshole neighbor’s first, at which time they did nothing but complain about the frickin’ mess in SIL’s back yard.

SIL and BIL were hard working folks, that really never slacked during their working careers. However, there must be a “white trash” gene between them that caused them to allow their back yard to look like a junk yard.

The inspector went on to tell them they had 10 days to clean up the yard.

They also discovered that although the street light was installed by an independent contractor, it is maintained by the power company, whose transformer from which the street light is powered, is in their back yard amongst the rubble.

So, to end this boring account of their plight, they have to get the yard cleaned, and pass an inspection so the contractor(s) can safely work to get the light installed, and the power to it restored.

That’s all I got; and well, pretty much all I need to know.

It’s a miracle…

Meditation for Today: John 14:7-14 | Missioning Pics 'n Flicks

In other news, and the previous escapade would be hard to top, the kid texted me late last night saying “there’s a light on in the shed”. I left the charger on the truck. “Just unplug it please, and I’ll tend to it in the morning.”

So, this morning, I went and the battery showed fully charged, and contrary to my belief, it was not a battery tender as well, so I put it up, and closed the hood…I just really did not feel like it yesterday. Am now shopping for a battery tender; man, those things cost as much as a charger.

So, since the outlaws are no longer coming, I guess the chef is back, and must find something to eat for tonight.

The kid was scheduled to work at 3 this afternoon, but she was gone when I made my trek to the shed. No idea where she could be, but I feel she may have got bitten by the “responsibility bug” and is buying a set of tires…nah, two miracles in one day is impossible.

My neighbor across the street texted me this morning “Hey X! Can I borrow your hacksaw?”

“Sorry, I broke mine last night cutting down a street light in a far away land.”


23 thoughts on “Zero Hour

  1. I have 4 different battery float chargers. The Battery Tender brand makes the NAPA and Harley Davidson brands of the float chargers. I have an old Sears Craftsman brand that crapped out after about 4 or 5 years. A Battery Tender Jr will maintain a fully charged battery for your truck and runs about $40. The 4.5 amp Battery Tender runs about $10 more but it will also charge. I like the Battery Tender brand.

  2. “God Works In Mysterious Ways” might apply here. Congratulations on your good fortune Ex. I would put away some of the preparations for their next visit but it sounds like the next couple of days will be better than you thought.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s